I just tried to google my brain

Last night Hayden and I were in Target. (Woo hoo!) We needed a few things before traveling to DC. We grabbed a basket and got to the toiletries isle and placed one or two items in and then three and four and then our arms started to blur and our pulses quickened as we hurled item after item into the basket. We caught ourselves when I frantically debated which facial scrub to buy a six month supply of. “Wait, we can come back here again…and again…and again even.” We quickly found the q-tips and scurried out relatively unscathed.

I’m not sure how I feel about being home. It’s overwhelming. On the one hand I’m delighted to have access to Tar-jay on a regular basis, but on the other hand, I’m not really familiar anymore with this sort of stable access to goods and information. I’m amazed that my dog seems fine with the 60 degree drop in temperature. He’s got the same fab prance, no matter that marum has been replaced by freezing cold tarmac.

I’m trying to struggling to figure out how hip I want to be about my clothing style and my information technology. I’m not sure I dig this no pants thing going on right now in women’s fashion and I definitely need to be talked into the touch screen phenomena. The new items I do embrace are done so a bit awkwardly. For example, a few minutes ago I tried to google my brain. I literally sat in front of the computer browser thinking I just came up with the perfect Christmas gift for Hayden and I can’t remember it. All I can remember is that it cost $199.99. I thought, “maybe if I type in ‘what would Hayden like’ and ‘199.99’ I’ll get the answer.” I realize things have gotten a lot more convenient and a lot more HD since I left, but I’m pretty sure googling one’s brain is not yet possible.

Speaking of Christmas…ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

And so the adjustment goes. I’m not even sure if I should keep this blog going. I mean, I’m not in Gulu anymore and I feel most of my observations now are trite and cynical retorts about how crazy and glutinous America is. For example, Hayden and I went suit shopping just before the Target incident and I said to the thirty-something salesman, “Do you have any Mad Men type suits?” I got a blank stare until I explained that it was a TV show. He tried to recover by explaining several customers have come in asking for Boardwalk Empire style suits. My mouth dropped open as he pulled out a ghastly wide wale pinstriped number and then I remembered that I was on exit 11 of the New Jersey Turnpike and what did I expect.

See? What a little snot I might become with observations like that…although, come on, Boardwalk Empire suits?!

TBD