A half day in the life

6:57am Awoken by Now Now the cat, who always wakes me up just at first light

7:34am Put water on for coffee, eggs on for cats (that’s right, I said it, eggs)

7:44am Take eggs to cats while fending off Now Now, whose vertical leap is 3’7’’

8:31am Jump in my 18 yr old vehicle that starts on the first turn over (woo hoo!) but who’s floor is sopping wet, because it rained last night (ugh.)

8:33am Arrive at the office a bit anxious about the meeting with the cultural leaders

8:34am Check facebook to distract me from the work. Alison’s in Dubai, Irene can feel the baby kick, Mick’s going home, and Jehan and Saad have Malaria.

9:04am Depart for meeting at the Acholi Palace

9:05am Call my gardener Johnson to ask him to retrieve some cow dung for the garden where I have just planted arugula, lettuce, broccoli and cilantro.

9:07am Stop abruptly at palace entrance because there is a nearly invisible rope across the drive way because there are workers digging the ditch for the fiber optic cable from Kenya

9:07am Arrive at the Acholi Palace and sit down in the middle of a dozen or so ancient chiefs

9:16am Call Acholi Prime Minister to ask if we were still planning to meet at 9am

9:30am Prime Minister arrives and we meet in his office. We are joined by the Program Manager for Ker Kwaro Acholi. The subject is the suspension of the project officer responsible for the “Culture as a Tool for Development” project KKA is implementing for us.

Meeting summary: the Project Officer is indisciplined. The worst they have ever seen. The problem is, I explain with fragile diplomacy, that he’s the only one that’s done any work. An awkward conversation ensues where I stubbornly refuse to look the program manager in the eye because I don’t think he’s doing any work. I also realize that Agnes and I have been played by the Project Officer who knows he’s the only one doing the work and has our support and therefore thinks he’s untouchable with his boss.

Meeting conclusion: They will write to the Project Officer to explain his crimes and misdemeanors and he will face the guillotine – I mean discipline panel – on Wednesday. Would it be terrible to remind everyone that Jesus rose this coming Sunday and the spirit of forgiveness should be profuse?

10:31am I wade through another group of chiefs, dressed in suits and leopard printed capes, with shields and depart the palace

10:37am Arrive back at the office to put the final touches on a first ever for SPRING grant cancellation that simultaneously breaks my heart and leaves me feeling resolved.

10:45am Ask my boss to sign the letter and then ask George to hand deliver the letter

10:51am Call my consultant Graham who answers the phone by saying “Are you sitting down?” Awesome. Bring it. He informs me that our Unpacking the P in PRDP partner has been quite obtuse in his presentation of the workplan on a research project whose deadline steadily approaches. I explain calmly (despite losing control of my limps which jitter and quake with each detail revealed by Graham) that I will send an email demanding that they complete section 2.1.3 of their grant agreement before proceeding to section 3.

11:14am Email to UPP partner sent, with conciliatory phrases like “worked hard and unearthed extremely interesting data” interspersed with passive aggressive phrases like “once we receive an update on these issues, we can move forward with the fund transfer request.”

11:15am Wondered why I came to work today

11:16am Told myself to buck up and get back to work

11:33am Checked yahoo email to find out that 7 of the 14 people I’m going away with this weekend had written a simple, non-committal email about logistics that further complicated and demanded from participants. I’m sure the weekend on the Ssesse Islands will be fun. No really! No, really really.

12:07pm Received a counter-signed cancellation letter from grantee

12:33pm Calculated pay roll for Café Larem not based on the “manager’s” calculations but on my own. Why are we paying him? His days may be numbered.

12:45pm Called Mollie to confer re pay roll. She shares my concerns about the manager.

1:07pm Depart for lunch via stop at my house where I confirm the cow dung dump (ha ha!) and scratch my dog on the belly for a few minutes, after which he shoves his nose in a big dirt pile and comes up white dog with a brown nose.

1:15pm Tuck into Diana Garden’s special: beans, rice, fried chicken with MSG and passion juice. Yum!

1:51pm Stop by the Café to pay who’s there and throw attitude at the manager

2:05pm Depart Café and trail behind a colleague speculating on her every move. Why did she need a driver to go to lunch? Who were those people she was with? Why did the car not turn left? Oh she must be going home? But she just passed her house. Oh, she’s going right. Interesting. I wonder what she’s up to. Swerve the goats, wave to the schmoopies “Munu, bye!!!”

2:10pm Arrive back at the office for more antics, I mean work.